12 STEPS ANOTHER POINT OF VIEW ABOUT STEP 8/11/12

12 STEPS ANOTHER POINT OF VIEW ABOUT STEP 8/11/12
8 step
We made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
a) In NA sometimes i hear people saying "i am doing emends...." most of that people are doing without done yet the step 4. All of steps have a sequence if u can look careful. So, why this step it’s the 8????????? Well after u made the step 4 u are able to pick up from there the persons you have to make those emends.
9. We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others
Ok what the 9 step means?
The nine step has an important information… you can’t see in there but is there :)
The step 9 teaches us about honesty and the limitations about that. Are people thinks they have to be honest everyday every time no matter what? sometimes its a twisted thing because we gaer we have to be honest in this program....ok we have for sure ...but we have to have balance in that. I cant say to a person: you know what I hate...I am sorry but I have to be honest I cant say: I had an affair with your wife and now I am doing emends and I have to be honest with you.... the answer to that probably will be: ok and now u finished my married, lol we have to have the wisdom to see when we can be honest or when u just shut up. One day I was in a meeting and a hear a guy sharing: I had cheated my girlfriend and now I have to tell her and ask her sorry." I went over the guy and I said: you can’t do that! U r not is honest... you just want get rip of the guilty if that guy goes over the girlfriend and if tells the true a few things will happen:
1- He gets rip of guilty and he will gives that guilty to the girlfriend. How? Simple....after she gets mad she will start think: was my fault...I am not good enough...what I have the wrong. I must have something... ia m not beautiful enough..etc so I told the guy: was your mistake so it’s your responsibility so now feel that and you will grow thru that pain. I know it’s hard to feel that guilty but now you have to feel it because it’s your consequence not hers consequence.
11. We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us, and the power to carry that out one more step with a lot of information...look careful and you will see this step get us ready to step 12 but this step bring us again to step 1 and 3. how?
Simple: carry the message isn’t saying: you have to do and you have to do now. No...Isn’t like that....recovery it’s a long process... a long road so why we came again to step 1 and 3? 1 - You carry the message but you have to understand you are powerless over that person. You give the information to that person and after you jump to step 3 ... letting the information in God hands (let it go) when we don’t do that it’s because that message it’s an ego thing, we want results and we want it now... BUT here comes again the consequences. How?
If u don’t admit you are powerless you are ready to start feel anger=empty=resentments you became enemy of yourself. But if you follow the step 11 you will see in step 12 how much gratitude you will feel. You will feel full of happiness and gratitude...because you are doing that for free like NA does with you.