quinta-feira, 4 de dezembro de 2008

I will survive yeah yeah yeah


Fun day, without a previous notice.
Today I awas doing a group and I notice that one of my clients got her feeligs hurt again by me. she made that sad face, like she always does. I asked if she had her feelings hurt again.
She lied saying no.
I have two clients they are very need clients, and its easy to have their feelings hurt. I look at her and I said: you will survive right? Then came to my mind a song “ I will survive” and I started to sing, lol
Then all the group was singing that song.
After the group I printed the lyric of the song, to everyone, and they started to sing it.
So now when someone gets their feelings hurt because they don’t get what they want when they want we will sing this:
At first I was afraid I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without you by my side;
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong
And I grew strong
And so you're back from outer space
I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face
I should have changed that stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I'd've known for just one second you'd back to bother me
Go on now, go walk out the door
Just turn around now
('cause) you're not welcome anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye
Did I crumble
Did you think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not.I. I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive;
I've got all my life to live,
I've got all my love to give and I'll survive,
I will survive. Hey hey.
It took all the strength I had not to fall apart
Kept trying' hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart,
And I spent oh so many nights
Just feeling sorry for myself. I used to cry
But now I hold my head up high
And you see me somebody new
I'm not that chained up little person still in love with you,
And so you feel like droppin' in
And just expect me to be free,
Now I'm savin' all my lovin' for someone who's lovin' me
Go on now.. etc.
LOL
FUNNY though
I told them for now one the extra smoke breaks are forbidden, and then I sang “ I will survive” and then answer “ yeah, yeah, yeah”
LOL

segunda-feira, 1 de dezembro de 2008

Horrible week Christmas season


Horrible week

This last week was horrible. Its Christmas time, and the clients are going insane. The week was about disease.
They screamed at each other, they called bitches at each other; they stopped people from sharing by telling them “is always you sharing! I am tired to listen to you”, they were hidden in their rooms, and no one notice, 2 of them ran away with 2 sets of clothes. People called me screaming that I gave the wrong description of clothes. I lost the control! I didn’t want to be there with all that craziness. Because we are not a TC anymore, they are feeling they can do whatever they want too. I miss TC!
Anyway, what is the true on this?
The true is they don’t have a clue why they are mad!!!! Once again, they aren’t aware!
Christmas time, thanks giving time, what that really means to the addict?
Grieve, lost, guilty, shame, powerless
They spend all year feeling a little of those at time. They don’t feel together. One week five of them are feeling that because their counselor gave them work on that. Next month more 5, and after that more 3, etc…
BUT, this time of the year - ALL OF THEM ARE FEELING THE SAME AT THE SAME TIME!Because they are so new in recovery they don’t understand what is going on with them, so they react, not act.
They transfer those feelings at each other.
Is that bad this season? NO! IS PERFECT!
This season can change the way they think, and take them to hate drugs.
It is going to happen???? NO! THEY ARENT AWARE, so they will keep fighting with each others.
It’s easy to look to others rather to look to ourselves. Always was, always will be!
I believe is a basic instinct!
So now let me explain what hell I am talking about here, what is my point.
GRIVE vs. LOST
The holiday season is a fact! They cannot deny. They see it everywhere. A simple Christmas three is too obvious to take them out of denial.
They are feeling the lost. They cannot celebrate Christmas. They cannot celebrate with their families, because they are in treatment. So they are feeling the lost, what take them right way to grieve.
Like you know grieve as a lot of stages. One of them is anger, and bargaining
.
Is exactly what they are doing with each other.
GUILTY
Guilty because they remember what they did to their families. All the harm they caused.
They are aware they cannot be with their children at this time, so they feel guilty for having their children spending the Christmas without them. Then in here takes also place religion!
How???? Really????
Oh yeah; Jesus = religion.
Religion = sin

Drug addiction; steal; prostitution; lie; all of this in the bible is A SIN. So they are feeling they are sinners. That will take them to feel SHAME.
POWERLESS
Lost of control. They cannot leave treatment to spend this season with the love ones.
See, at this time a lot is up. They are feeling this all of them at same time.
You can tell me that everyone is different, and I will tell you that you are right, BUT, the Christmas is for everyone, and because of that I can say they are feeling the same.
So I have half the unit arguing, and screaming = active anger
The other half wants to sleep = passive anger
Now me as a counselor, and a human being what role did a play on that?
I did my best as a counselor.
As a human being I am going through the same, because I don’t have family here, and I am feeling guilty to not be with my mother who is alone in my country.
So I am not the best counselor at this time to them. I believe that my colleagues are going to do a better job with them at this time.
I am just going to wait that this season is over.
Well, what better video than this one to explain this