I found out the true

Let’s talk about the perfect NA member. Let’s talk about the ones who have sponsee, and do a lot of service work in NA. Let’s talk about one I know very well.

So the guy is going to go back and use. When? I don’t know.
Here his story: he was married for 25 years. At the end of his marriage he decided to go to Mexico and started dating prostitutes. He kept trying to rescue them, by take them with him to USA. Didn’t work because they had other men. He kept going to those bars in Mexico and spent the night there. One day one of the prostitutes was an addict, and of course he tried to rescue her. He end up using Coke for the first time, and never stop until 3 years ago. So he thought that she was another weak one for him to control, and he end up been control.
Mexico and prostitute had become a “trust relationship” to him. Like I said before a trust relationship is when you know what something or someone is going to make you feel. Doesn’t matter if what you are going to feel is bad or good, what matters is you know exactly what you are going to feel.
If he started to use in Mexico during is search for prostitute, so that would be call “relapse process”.
Explanation:
Question: let’s suppose you go home and you tell your wife:
“Do you know what happen today? I went to the dope house to make sure I don’t want to use anymore”
What answer do you think your wife will give to you?
What answer do you think your co workers will give to you?
Please readers, I really would like you to answer this question, and soon I will tell you the reason I am making this question.
He started going to Mexico, and I remember the first time he went to Mexico was when he went to the world convention by himself. He said he would go pass in Mexico before the convention.
I asked him if he wasn’t afraid to go to Mexico since he has that relationship with that place.
He said no, very secure of him, very upset with my question.
I told him: today you go, tomorrow you will pick a prostitute, and then at the end you are going back to use.
After I said that he asked to leave calling me names.
The addiction to porn started and I told him that one of this days isn’t going to be enough and he goes to look for the really thing.
See people say I have an anger issue, true, but also they say that because I tell them the true on their faces.
So the times go by, and guess what I found out yesterday. I went again to that site where I call a meat market of women traffic. I decided to join them in order to read the 9 posts of my husband. I was allowed to see his posts and I found out that all his travels to Mexico are to pay to prostitutes. Let me rephrase again: ALL HIS TREAVELS!
I confronted them and he realized he was caught, and he told me the true. Now let me tell you what he said:
- He goes to the prostitutes and then goes to the NA meeting, or goes to NA first and then goes to the prostitution place.
- One of the last times he went there to be a speaker at a convention, and before he spoke he was with one prostitute.
- He told me that he went to the old places he used drugs, and bought drugs, to find out he didn’t want to use again.
You see now why early ago I asked you that question in this blog.
See, I keep wondering how a man who gets 900.00 dollars A WEEK from his work , never has money, always very worry about money, and in his bank statements says that he doesn’t have any money saved.
He doesn’t pay gas because he works with company car.
So now we know why he doesn’t have money, don’t we?
What I told him? I told him:
“I told you so! I told you that one day porn would be enough and you would go look for the real thing.
I told you that Mexico was a trigger for you, and is your relapse process. First you go there to feel confident that you can go there and nothing happens.
Of course the first time nothing happens, because you are there in alert to justify that YOU CAN GO to old places, people, and things. So the second time you decided to get a prostitute in order to justify again that you CAN DO IT WITHOUT GO BACK AND USE. But the second time wasn’t enough anymore, because without notice you was there again, and again, and again. So then you decided that you have the power to go visit the old places, and dope houses. See, step 1 is about I am powerless, and you are trying to gain control. So now you can’t stop, because the disease of addiction is in control now. So let me tell you what is next; one day one of those prostitutes is going to be someone very criminal, very manipulative. She is going to make your head like happen before. You are going to follow in love, because you are already exposed. Then you are going to find out that she is using drugs, and then you are going to start to take her to the meetings. So she goes one day, she stays clean 1 day, and then she relapses 2 days. You keep taking her to the meetings and be her sponsor, but she will start to run away. You will wake up and she is not there because she went to the dope house. You panic! Then you go to the dope houses looking for her. The love of your life ran away, needs to be rescue, and take away from the dope house. The end of this is just one: the disease of addiction has more power than you, and after this entire rescue, one day you will tell her: give me that, I want to use to! For the first time he didn’t acted on anger. I had a feeling that he was desperate to tell someone. Can that be possible? Or I am been naïve.
Here we have a guy who does a lot of service work, who goes to MY TREATMENT CENTER to talk about recovery, an then had all this text messages on his phone form ex clients of the place I work. So I am doing a work witch is trying to take those women from the street, and then this guy contributes for them to stay in the streets.