The taker

The taker

Yesterday I was talking with my mentor about one of my clients. I asked him if I could forbid her to receive property, as cigagarrtes, etc.
He told no that is a right they have. And it's true, is the client law,and rights.
Why I wanted to take her privilege to receive property? Am I a mean person? NO!
I believe that will save her life. Let me explain; she is a taker and she uses the system. She is a 44 years old client who keeps coming back to jail, and treatment.
Using the system is easy because they have bed, food, and the only thing they have to do is to sit in groups all day long. So becomes comfortable. Then they have their family who send them cigartes, a and what they need. I will go in other way, and see if I can make her face her reality.
So today I had an individual session with her. I was would be a normal one on one. Wasn’t!!!
The first thing she told me was: “I am hearing voices”
Well in this kind of population, hearing voices means they want to be on medication. Once they get medication they will be sleeping all day long, and avoiding treatment. Is what they do to avoid treatment. I hear her with very calm. Of course my desire was to tell her” so you want to get high to avoid treatment”. I didn’t say it. I think I also getting better on that don’t tell what I think, and hold it.
Then she asked me she wanted to write her brother who is in jail. I said no. she complain by saying wants fair. Then she told me she wanted to check her hepatitis c, and see what is wrong with her liver.
Oh my, oh my… see, the takers, when they was using drugs they didn’t care about any of this, but now they will try everything to not be focus on their inside. It’s easy to be focus on outside issues.
She kept crying, and I realized that she is facing her reality. She is trying to run form it, but I wont let her.
I told her that I want to take her to the point that she will face what she lost because of drugs. Once she faces it she will be angry at drugs, and will not want to come back. I told her: ‘here is the thing, I am going to make sure this is the last time you come back to treatment. For me you are not just on e more case. For me you are someone that I want to see successes. I told her that she needs to change the way she thinks. She believes that the world owns her, and then she doesn’t stop to ask for this and that, and more that. I also told her that is having a coin flip side, because the true is when she thinks that the world owns her she will keep coming back until she dies.
I told her that she needs to surrender, and feel what she needs to feel in order to grow as a human being.
I let to do a phone call to her family. Guess what she did?
She started to cry on the phone asking for forgiveness.
Taker syndrome.
So, the family is getting ready to spend a lovely thanks giving, and then the addict calls to get rid of the guilty that is feeling.
Guilty transference!
So now we have a family in pain, talking about the addict, because the addict decided to avoid feelings and transfer it to her family.
I wrote about the 2 kinds of victims on this blog a long time ago http://ivonejft.blogspot.com/2008/06/two-kinds-of-victim.html
I told her that she will have this as her treatment work to do.
I don’t work much with books, hand out books. I work more with my head. See I believe we learn a lot when we questioning ourselves

Client is to write " what I don't have and I would like to have"
Client is to write " what I lost with my use"
Client is to write “This is my reality…" write a list
Client is read the book “emotional vampires"
Client is to write " I am ready to give up of… " write a list

So lets see what is going to happen.
My next individual will be… guess with who??? The angry client, lol. I believe I will be here writing again soon. Lol
Rock n’ rol