The scared client

The scared client
I already wrote about this client, this week.
Yesterday I looked at her she was with her face down.
Then I had all this going on with one of my clients who tried to kill another client, so at the middle of the morning I was already tired. At afternoon, one of my clients came to me to tell me that the scared client wanted to talk with he probation officer and leave treatment, and go back to jail.
I just thought: “oh God, here we come again, I don’t have patience for this anymore”
I called and she comes, and before I spoke she said: I want to see my probation officer, because I want to leave and g back to jail.
That really irritated me, and I didn’t react well. I said:
“-No. you are not going to see your probation officer because you need to follow the protocol. First you need to see the supervisor.”
She said “he told I could leave if I want to, and I can choose to go to another treatment. I don’t like this one because is too many people.”
My answer to her was: so today you are going to another treatment, then you are not going to like and you go to other. Stop feeling sorry about yourself, and face yourself. I know what you want. You want to go back and use drugs.”
She said: no. I just don’t want to be here, I want to go back to jail. They want me to do my testimony in front of this entire people, and I am not going to do.”
The testimony she is talking about is MRT (Moral Recognition Therapy), and they have to stand up and do their testimony in front of everyone.
I told her to go sit in group, and I would tell the supervisor that she wants to go back to jail.
She left, and I continue working.
I kept looking at her, and she kept crying, hiding her face.
I thought for a minute, and my heart spoke more high. I know what I needed to do, so I just needed to follow my heart.
I walk into the group, and she didn’t see me coming. I asked the person who was sit by her side to stand up, and give me her chair.
I sat over her, and I asked her: “so what you need to read?”
She looked at me, and she said: “this!
I told her: ok so let’s do it together. We are going to stand up together, and read it together.
She was admired, and then she told me: why are you doing this??? I already made up my mind! I am going back to jail!
My answer was: “yeah, it’s ok. If you want to go back you go back, but for now we are going to do this together.
She stood up with me, and she started to read and cry. At the end of her testimony she read “… and I compromise to do this treatment, until the end…”
I look at her and I said” what did you say? Say it again ;)
She smiled, because she found out that she wrote she wanted to stay.
Everyone clap at her, and then I left the group, and I blink my eye to her.
After 20 minutes, the supervisor came, and I told him that client wanted to talk with him because she wanted to go back to jail.
She started to run to the office saying: “no, no. I don’t want to go anymore!
I told her: oh. Ok. So wee need a schedule. Next time you want to leave needs to be between Wednesday, and Saturday while I am here 
She laughs
My first attitude wasn’t ok. But I changed, and I went to help.
I get out of my comfort chair and my bad attitude to go help her and make a difference.
Today I will sleep better at night