Sex and Recovery

Yesterday at lunch time I notice the clients started to say:

- NO bread, NO butter please

- NO, NO, NO butter, NO bread

Those are the elders and the 3b, so that means they are the ones who are almost done with their treatment.
I went over them and I said: no butter and bread hum??!! So, who are the ones getting ready to have sex???
Mostly of them put their hands up, some putted both hands.
They started laugh, and saying they have to lose weight, what I answer:
Why at the end of you treatment? You are losing weigh now because you are making yourself ready to have sex.
And they agree with what I said.
I thought: I need to make them land in treatment again, but I can not say that isn’t ok to have sex so soon, so I need to find away…other ways to send the message, and let them thing that was their idea, not mine.

Today at 9 am my brain started work, and I had an amazing idea.
Called them up, and I circle all of them.
I told to 5 of them to go to the middle of the circle with pillows.
No one understood what was going on, the counselor must be crazy, lol.
Then I said:

One at the time goes beat up the pillows, and I wanted you to say: I hate you because…..
Guess what showed up????

I hate you because you molested me

I hate you because you left me alone with our children

I hate you because you abandoned me

I hate you mom because you never care for me

I hate you because you died

I hated because I was just a little girl

I hate you because I am tired to been abused by men

I hate you because is my second time in treatment

I hate you because you destroy my life

I hate because you was messing around


All of them started crying, because they were feeling their own pain, and their sister’s pain
They knew exactly what their sisters were feeling, because they are one of them, in these abusive relationships.

At 10 am I circle them up again, and the group was an audio book named: verbally abusive relationships.

The message is simple: what is beyond, hide sex?

What comes with sex?

What is next?

Are you ready to have sex without to be abuse?

Can you handle it now?

Are you sure that is what matters?

Are you sure??

What really happens when you have sex?

What you have not been talking about?

What is the reality?

I believe now they are not horny anymore

At the end I told them:

so you still want to have sex? :) welcome to treatment again:


11.30 am all of them ate bread :) ;)