Sharing my Sunday night

Here I am at the club looking around, without know what I am really doing here. The music is laud, people are talking laud.
I am here by myself, quite like a mousse.
I came to sit outside. It’s a little cold, but is a beautiful night.
It’s calmer outside, and I can write better all my thoughts and feelings.
I fell alone in the crowd, don't know where I can go, or with I would like to be.
I looked at the end of the street, where my Ex French, boy friend lives, but I cannot see him.
Why I would want to see him?
Well, I think this is the worse part of a grieve, when I want to negotiate human beings.
I'm sad and alone, but I do not have the right to go use people just because I feel sad and alone.
I am writing as it comes to my mind, like the wind that is passing by my cold face.
Today I saw a baby dog very thin. I rush to the coffee to buy him some food. He ate he was hungry. My heart was so broken watching that small dog. I kept thinking a way to bring him home. I start to walk, and he walked with me. If he had made it to my home, I would let him stay. He didn't! He got entertainment with something, and I walk out leaving him.
I kept thinking about that dog.
I hope I see him tomorrow to feed him. I gave him the name "fallen angel"
Funny, was the only name that came to my mind. I don't think the dog would deserve that name. I would I have change it.
Fallen angels they are deceive. They walk by you smelling roses, showing you heaven. They use soft words and you fall asleep on those words. They have blue eyes, to show you the sun over the ocean.
Those eyes will embriagate you, and make you believe that you can walk over water that you don't drawn.
When the masks fall you can see those blues eyes turning to red, and you will fall like a star from the sky. The fall is quick and painful.
The ground is all you have.
The smell of roses turns into grass.
No one is there! Even if you look at the sky and call their name, you just see dark clouds.
The other side of the club is another club. The people there are getting drunk, and I see this blond girl who keeps screaming " alibaba"
She is upsetting me, with all that screaming.
I keep listening French, since are many French people here.
I think is beginning to rain...
I can feel it through my fingertips.
I look at the sky, and it falls on my face.
I think its time to go now.
If I could, I would be at one of our castles. I would like to spend the rest of this night at one Portuguese castle.
I've been thinking to rent a wedding dress and go take pics at a chapel near by.
I would lay down surrounded of candles looking at the roof where the saints are painted.
It’s kinda of erotic, all those saints half-naked.
Something is haunting. I feel like a worrier who is been haunti
ng by fallen angels.
Far way I can hear music. Seams like a band is out there. I'm going to dress, and I will go there now. Brb to tell how it was.
Funny, I wouldn't dare walking at night at Texas, but I love to do it in this small village.
The church bells are ringing, the donkey smell is in the hair, the couples walk holding hands. The old couples walk separate. She goes in front of him. The youngest play pool.
Here I am near of the stage.
Funny,lol the blond girl who was screaming at the club is the singer of the band... OK, now she has my sympathy lol.
Damn, the guys that are playing are so cute! Ok, let me get out of here before I get insane.
Let go find the dog. Where he can be? I guess he is gone!
This is so stupid, all the band were in that club, but like always I walk looking at the floor and not make eye contact with people. Well,hoW I would know they were a band. Let me go make eye contact with people, and let's see what happen.
Nothing happen, I go home now.
I am walking and see my reflection on the window stores. I am been loosing so much weigh, finally. My legs are again skinny, my big ass is gone, and now I am losing in my harms, and neck. Finally, I feel going back to European normal size.
Here some videos I took from the band, and some pics….. One of th epics is a little bar of beer in the middle of the street, lol
One of tghe videos is me this afternoon trying to walk through trees, and I couldn't