Desire to change

so after my last post, when I decide to expose myself I made some decisions.
why I say expose myself???
It's easy for a human being to keep doing insanaty in secret, and that insane part just will get strong. Once exposed creats feelings of shame, and guilty due that expusure. Once I become emotional about it, I make decisions.
Being honest is my strongest weapon against insanaty.
today I decide to pay some more of the university, and now I am waiting for them to allow me to continue my lessons.
I didn't meet anyone in th elast 3 days, so I can say I am recovering
for now it's all