Rejection group 1

in the other day I was doing a group about rejection. This would be my first group in my country with male population.
Funny the last time i did a group about rejection was in USA and just took me 1h.
This one took me 2 groups, lol
i believe that time and experience made me have more subject on this matter, and i was able to do 2 days about rejection.
So, now i divide rejection in two parts.
The first part is what they feel when they are rejected, and i base myself on
Rational emotive behavior therapy
what I think – what I believe - how I react

This is what they learn..... I go more far and teach them tools to deal with it


The examples i give is about “ today” how clients feel rejection in their daily bases.
What brings them the feeling of rejection.
Most of them say is when they hear the word NO. I ask them why that NO was so powerful.
They didn't know what to answer.
So i ask them to tell me what they think after they hear the word NO. usually is the thoughts of anger.
They start with “ why I
“ If I
“you should give me
“ you are not being fair with me

well, if you see, you can notice the (I, ME) a lot = EGO
I ask them, why they keep asking what they already know they are not going to get it?
Why they keep trying to manipulate to get what they want?
Why they keep wanting so much from life?
You already saw what a client normal do after hear a NO?
Did you already saw what is their second reaction????
they go to their bedrooms, or they will sit alone.
So now lets go see where, and when was the times they felt rejection......where that comes from.....
where they have learned?????
in their childhood!!!!!!!!!
the lost child, the abandoned child
the clients keep the work that their parents had start by find ways that will place them abandoned again!
That is why everything for them is a big thing!!!!!!!!!!
they maximize problems a lot!!!!!
they want to keep feeling this....follow me:

powerless = why they want to feel this, they even hate being powerless
because that will bring them the feeling of unworthy- shame – guilty – not capable
how many clients choose to ask what they know they cant have in order to be rejected to justify “ she doesn't like me” - “ she likes more that other client” - I need to do better in order for her to like me” - the others can, but I don't. Its always the same with me”
they are never satisfied and they feel empty all the time.
They had suffer of abandoned, and they had learn how to feel it, so therefor they try to find way to keep feeling what had become comfortable for them.
Is like when they relapse. Relapse is a way to abandoned the (I) the inner child. Is to left their inner child alone in the middle of the living room”